White Trash Party!

From Wikipedia:

White trash is a derogatory American English racial slur referring to poor white people, especially in the rural South of the United States, suggesting lower social class and degraded standards of living. The term suggests outcasts from respectable society living on the fringes of the social order, who are seen as dangerous because they may be criminal, unpredictable, and without respect for authority whether it be political, legal, or moral. The term is usually a racial slur, but may also be used self-referentially by working-class whites to jokingly describe their origins or lifestyle.

It always tickles me when people call me white trash. Clearly the official definition doesn’t apply to me in any way whatsoever, but the slang definition (redneck, hillbilly, etc.) also couldn’t be further from the truth. I wonder, then, what makes them think that calling me white trash would be insulting? Let’s explore this phenomenon.

  • Am I white trash because I am overweight? Surely there are no fat rich people. But I can lose weight – you’re ugly on the inside and that will never change.
  • Am I white trash because I receive government assistance? Well, here’s the thing – I never did before Poke fucked up our entire life. I never needed it, I never wanted it. I still don’t want it, but I don’t have a choice.
  • Maybe I’m white trash because I am a SAHM who runs her own home-based business? Or could it be that I’m white trash because I have a college degree, like everyone else in my families?
  • I might be white trash because I don’t spend thousands of dollars on clothing for myself or my children. Because I prefer inexpensive or second-hand clothing, that means I am trashy. It has nothing to do with my disgust at the sheer amount of materials being discarded and piling up in landfills, leaving a mess for future generations.
  • Oh, I know! I’m white trash because I come from a middle class family, my parents (both bio and adoptive) all own their own homes, my father makes over $90K per year, and I went to private school my entire life.
  • Am I white trash because I occasionally feed my family fast food and/or food from a box, like mac’n’cheese or Hamburger Helper? Well, not so much Helper now that Poke is gone – that shit is gross.
  • Perhaps I’m white trash because I have four rescue cats as pets. Everyone knows that white trash have lots and lots of animals roaming around.
  • Maybe I am white trash because I live in a trailer in a trailer park? Oh… wait. I live in a house with a fenced in yard in a nice suburban neighborhood. Weird.
  • I know! I am definitely white trash because I believe in equality for all people regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, etc., and I am liberal leaning socialist, and I enjoy having Obama as president, support gun control, love the ACA, and yet I’m still Catholic and pro-life.
  • I must be white trash because both my children are physically and mentally/academically ahead of their peers.
  • Am I white trash because I drink my wine from a box? Yeah, okay, you’ve got me on that one. That is kinda trashy… but I also like to save money, so I’ll take it.

Overall, I think it’s pretty clear that I am most definitely not white trash. To me, when someone stoops to calling me that, it’s obvious they have absolutely zero fodder for the fight. They say to themselves, “Damnit! That bitch says nothing but the truth! I can’t prove her wrong! What can I do… hmmm… I know! I will call her names. That’ll show her!” It’s all quite amusing. Call me names, insult me, I don’t care. You can say what you want, but I know the truth, and all my friends and family know the truth as well. The only person who is coming off as trashy – and ignorant – is you.

Talk about TMI – For the ladies only!

So, I’m not usually one to talk about my monthlies to the entire world, which is essentially what I am about to do… However, I feel this info needs to be out there!

I recently started using the Diva Cup, which is a menstrual cup, in place of tampons and pads. I have never been totally comfortable with those forms of protection, and I’ve been doing this for 21 years! I always dreaded my period because it meant that I had to deal with those annoying diaper-like pads, the tampons that were drying and uncomfortable, the inability to do the “normal” things I love to do – like stand up from a squatting position. Being a girl sucked.

Enter an ad on the side of my Facebook feed: The Diva Cup. WTF? Gross. No way. I read into it, and changed my mind. Hmmm… This might not be too bad. I asked my friends if anyone had ever tried one. I only have one friend who has used a menstrual cup, and she loved it. She’s a professional hiker, and used it while she was hiking the Appalachian Trail. Well shit, if someone can use this thing while hiking crazy terrain, certainly I can use it in my everyday life! I was ready to try it.

Then, I got pregnant. So I held off on buying one. Of course, after Squeaks was born, I couldn’t use it anyway (LOL at the medical instructions: Nothing in the vagina for six weeks. NOTHING!). Well here we are ten weeks later and I’ve finally gotten my first period (Yay?) and I was so excited to finally use The Diva Cup!

The first day was a bit awkward. There are two ways to “fold” the cup to be inserted, and I tried the first way, which did not work. Once I switched to the other way, I had no problems. The negative reviews on Amazon claimed that it is very messy and disgusting and there’s no way you can empty/clean it in public. I totally disagree. It is no more disgusting or messy than changing a tampon, and there’s no smell and you don’t need to use eight feet of toilet paper to wrap it up and hide it in that weird metal trash bin. They suggest rinsing it with water every time, but it wipes clean with tp very easily.

The cost is kind of high, $30, but it is worth it. Just think about how much money you have spent on tampons, pads, etc. just to throw them away. It is like throwing money away, but a necessary evil. The Diva Cup pays for itself in just a few months, being that the average 36 pack of pads costs $10-15.

Overall, I would definitely suggest trying The Diva Cup. It is so comfortable and easy to use! And earth friendly!