I’m Back

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It’s been a long time since I updated, thanks mostly to my chromebook keyboard suddenly ceasing to work properly. I don’t know what happened, it just stopped working one day. Then a few weeks later, half the keys worked but there was no real pattern to it. So I finally got a wireless USB keyboard and mouse from my dad, and now I can use my chromebook again! YAY!

ji2So anyway, kindergarten started off great. The first day was, in JI’s words, “Absolutely perfect”. I cried for about twenty minutes when he got home. Day two… shit hit the fan. My son JI was sent to the peak aka behaviour room. Day three, okay. Day four, his behaviour was so bad that I had to pick him up early and he was asked to not return. They wrote on the report that he assaulted a teacher. He’s five. He kicked her because she got too close. JI was off for the next week as we tried to find a spot in an ED classroom rather than the general SpEd/Autism room he was in the first week. We got a spot at a different school, and he attended half days at the original school for a week until the transportation was figured out.

He’s been at the new school for a full week, three days, plus Monday and Tuesday. Monday was his first rough day, but he got himself under control. Yesterday after lunch/recess, I guess he started melting down and couldn’t stop. The teacher called me at 2:45pm, and I could hear JI screaming. He said JI was throwing chairs, trying to bite/hit/kick, took off his socks and shoes and threw them, etc. He wouldn’t or couldn’t calm down. It wasn’t until they told him I wouldn’t be coming that he calmed down to get on line for the bus.

jiThe problem is that he doesn’t act like this at home. He doesn’t get violent or aggressive towards me or any other people – and to be clear, he wasn’t at school either, not towards any kids or adults until the adults attempted to get close to him. If he and I have a disagreement, I either remind him of his choices or I tell him the consequences of not doing what he’s told. I’m frustrated because I’m not the special education teacher, I’m not the expert, but they expect me to tell them what to do. I don’t know what to do because he does not do this around me! There was a short period of time when he did, but we suffered through it and moved on. I merely held my ground.

Is JI trying to feel them out? Is there something about school that changes a kid’s personality? Will this eventually pass, or is my high functioning, highly intelligent, super cute, loving autistic child doomed to end up in juvenile detention or some kind of home?! I know it’s the first incident but the way things went at the last school, I’m really nervous. We had a conversation last night and this morning about how he should act when he’s upset or angry, and I hope it sticks.

Homemade Teething Biscuits

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Squeaks started teething pretty early, much like JI did when he was six months old. Now, at eight months, Squeaks has all four front teeth! The biscuits helped him for the month he was teething hardcore. They’re chewy, healthy, and super easy to make! These biscuits don’t dissolve like rusks do, so be prepared for a little mess if baby isn’t too good at chewing and swallowing!

Teething Biscuits

  • 1 cup baby cereal (I used oatmeal)
  • 1/2 jar baby food (I used applesauce)
  • 1 ripe banana, smashed
  • Water

Combine first three ingredients; add water as needed to make a smooth, thick dough – like play dough consistency. Spread on a parchment lined sheet, and bake at 400F until completely baked through, 20-30 minutes. Let cool, cut into rectangles. You want the bars to be large enough that baby will not choke. Store in an airtight container in the fridge.

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Summertime Rules

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There are quite a few articles going around right now about how parents need to let their kid have the “1970s Summer”, and I could not agree more! I remember summer being an amazing time of playing outside with my friends, riding my bike all over the neighborhood, creating adventures and fantastical stories, putting on plays and using my imagination in the most amazing ways. I had a computer, and I would use it on rainy days, and we had a TV, and sometimes I just wanted to stay inside and watch TV all day or play with my Barbies for hours. Regardless, my mom and dad basically did little to entertain me. My dad would take me to the park after he got home from work or on weekends, but otherwise I was left to my own devices. When my brother Scrod was old enough to play, they had a harder time with him because he wanted to do EVERY SINGLE SPORT in the world (except soccer), so they had to run him all over the place and go to practices and games and all that crap. Not me!

But I digress.

Having a four year old is a little different from having a five year old, and having a kid period is very different from it was in the 70s, 80s, and even 90s. These days everyone is in everyone’s business, and not in the good way like it was back then. Now, instead of the village helping raise the children and looking out for each other’s families, the village is poised ready to attack when they see another parent doing something they disagree with. You have probably heard recently about somwpid-20150530_121405_20150602000413349.jpge parents who ran into trouble with the law – twice! – because they let their kids walk home from school and go to the park alone. The kids were ten and almost seven years old! If I thought he’d come back at a reasonable time and could pay attention to traffic, I’d have no problem sending JI to the park by himself. He’s just a bit too young and irresponsible this summer – maybe next summer.

My point is, though, and I think the point of the other parents writing these articles, is that we really need to disengage from the idea that children run our world or our lives. I have a few more posts coming up that will be discussing this subject, and I look forward to discussing with my readers about the subject. Back in my childhood, my parents were #1 – not me. Yes, I got everything I needed and practically everything I wanted. I was not neglected in any way. But my parents didn’t bow to me, they didn’t hover over me to ensure success, they didn’t pave the way with pillows so that I’d never get hurt. I had to take my lumps and learn my lessons just like they did. I don’t know when the shift occurred from family centric (ie, do what is good for all involved) to child centric (ie, make sure each child gets exactly what they want/need at all costs).

This brings me back to the idea of an 80s summer (I wasn’t alive in the 70s hehe), which is what I want for JI, and what I will be doing my best to accomplish for him. Yes, that statement sounds like I’m being child centric, but let me lay it out for you. I wpid-20150530_092849.jpgwill not be planning many activities. I will not be driving him to COSI, the Zoo, a hundred play-dates, museums, classes, etc. etc. etc. Yeah, we will probably go to the Zoo once or twice a week – because I LOVE the zoo and we have a membership and it is free. Sure, we will hit up COSI a couple of times every month, because we have a membership and it is free. I’m not going to go broke trying to entertain my child. I want him to get dirty. I’m going to let him eat lots of popsicles. I want him to get scraped knees and bruises because he is playing so hard. (Disclaimer: I don’t actually want my kid to get hurt! But if he does, it won’t be the end of the world.) The way he climbs without fear makes me worried that this might be the summer of a broken limb. I’m going to utilize The Bored Jar. I’m going to send him out in the morning after breakfast, let him in for lunch, send him back out until snack time, and then maybe I’ll sit him down for an activity. If I feel like it. I’m going to let him get sticky and filthy and have black bare feet. I want him to remember this summer as an amazing, awesome, wonderful time when he got to grow up and be a real boy instead of mommy’s baby.

But he’ll always be my baby, we all know that.

So the rules of this summer are as follows:

  1. No whining.
  2. No begging.
  3. If it looks fun, do it.
  4. If you get hurt, tell me.
  5. Be brave.
  6. Be strong.
  7. Use your brain.
  8. Use your muscles.
  9. Drink from the hose.
  10. Have fun!
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This is what adults do for fun in the summertime…

Mom… I’m Bored!

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Kids are always looking for things to do, and we do not always have the desire, time, or patience to entertain them. This summer, I will be utilizing a popular trend, The Bored Jar. I am going to fill our Bored Jar with the following 50 activities that JI can complete with little to no assistance from Poke or me. As I stated in a previous post, this summer is going to be the summer of growing, and I plan on helping JI mature by giving him more responsibility and more trust. I want him to learn to be his own “man”, so to speak! Also, when it gets hot, I get suuuuuuuuuuper lazy. Not gonna lie.

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  1. Clean the bathroom floor
  2. Pull weeds
  3. Work in workbook (or other skills activity, such as tracing letters)
  4. Play on slip’n’slide
  5. Wipe down all inside doors with magic eraser
  6. Play in the sprinkler
  7. Draw with chalk outside
  8. Draw with chalk inside (if you have a chalkboard!)
  9. Do 20 jumping jacks
  10. Draw a picture for a friend
  11. Put away laundry
  12. Clean the toilet
  13. Wipe down counters/tables
  14. Read for at least 10 minutes
  15. Go on a treasure hunt (make up lists in advance!)
  16. Tell me a story
  17. Play with bubbles
  18. Go swimming
  19. Run from A to B 10 times (ours would be deck to fence)
  20. Build a fort
  21. Make an alphabet list (candies A-Z, characters, boys/girls names, etc.)
  22. Vacuum living room
  23. Vacuum bedrooms
  24. Play with sibling(s)
  25. Ride your bike
  26. Swiffer the kitchen
  27. Jump on the trampoline for 10 minutes
  28. 10 minute dance party
  29. Do a puzzle
  30. Play a board game
  31. Paint
  32. Play in the basement (or another room they rarely utilize)
  33. Clean all the mirrors in the house
  34. Dust house
  35. Have a picnic
  36. Wash dishes
  37. Pick up all the trash/toys/miscellaneous stuff around the house
  38. Wash the car
  39. Feed the pets
  40. Clean the bathtub
  41. Draw a picture of your family
  42. Watch a movie
  43. Pick a new recipe for dinner from a kids’ cookbook
  44. Play hide and seek
  45. Learn a new kid-friendly recipe (no bake pie, PBJ, etc.)
  46. Play dress up
  47. Do a “photoshoot” – give your kid a disposable camera or clear out your digital cam and let them go crazy!
  48. Spin in a circle until you fall over
  49. Play basketball/soccer/baseball
  50. Set up croquet or mini golf (or badminton or volleyball – use what you have!)

School’s Out for Summer!

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JI had his last day of school on Thursday, finishing up a great last week of school. This school year has been very difficult for us, from starting out at another school as an NT peer to being recast as disabled by the school system, then switching schools at the same time that Squeaks was being born and record amounts of snow were falling on central Ohio causing several weeks of snow days.

wpid-20150523_182057.jpgLearning how to behave in a different classroom setting was a challenge as well. At the public schools here, a red-yellow-green system is used, and in the beginning JI was constantly on red (all kids start on green and get moved to yellow and then red depending on their behaviour). I was feeling really poorly as a parent, but over time I realized that he just had to work it out and learn how to do it their way. This was tough because I always want my baby to be his best! I looked at his sticker chart for the month of May, and he only had four redwpid-20150526_164525.jpg days! Spectacular! JI has ended this school year on such a positive note, and I could not be more proud of him for all the growing and changing he has done.

Also today I received the paperwork that JI’s teacher filled out in regards to his social behaviour and such in the classroom. There were three questionnaires to be completed, and I have to say that I was pleasantly surprised by the answers. There were a lot of things that he does that I thought he didn’t do, such as play with other kids and act wpid-20150519_111334.jpgappropriately in group settings. He wasn’t doing that at the beginning of the year. Now I’m wondering, and hoping almost, that he behaviour problems were just temporary and that he doesn’t have ASD or ODD or related disorders. Of course I’m still going to keep going with the evaluations, because I’d rather test for everything and get a ton of negatives than stop testing and have him fall behind again. He definitely still has sensory issues, so behaviour therapy will definitely help with that.

wpid-20150527_134717.jpgI’m very excited for this summer. I think JI is going to mature a great deal between now and August, and hopefully next school year won’t be as emotionally demanding as this past school year. I have heaps of ideas in my brain about what to do to help JI in that maturing process, and I cannot wait to share them with you all. The next three months are going to be unique in that JI is becoming an actual boy, not just a toddler or preschooler, and Squeaks is going to be doing a whole lot of growing, and might be sitting up and maybe even crawling by the end of the summer. I am just so eager to see it all happen!